Nature Blog Network

Sunday, October 28, 2007

Spineless Song of the Week - Video Blog: Thats Why the Spineless Are Atheist

This is my first attempt at a videoblog (vlog)! I wrote this song to explain to the public that even a creature with but a few coiled up ganglia knows there is no God, then why do we, with our large brains, insist on believing in superstition? Mark Twain, one of my literary heroes growing up, once wrote "Faith is believing what you know ain't so."

The video was shot at night in my backyard with a camping light and a candle using the iSight camera and microphone built into my Macbook. Yeah it was a bit chilly, which is why I am wearing a touk and jacket. Unfortunately, the combination of my children bedtimes, the thin walls and small space of our flat I am forced to take drastic measures to provide you with invertatainment. Thank "God" for Stoudt's American Pale Ale!

Thats Why the Spineless Are Atheist

Now listen here my good ole friends
And let me tell me you how this all ends
There ain’t no afterlife out there
Just a dead carcass with worms out the ears

For you it may come as a surprise
A great big scam, years of lies
But even more surprising to me
All we had to do was listen you see

It may have started fore the Precambrian
A little spark in earth’s great ocean
With a little time you’ll plainly see
Differential reproduction is the key

The critters have known since the end of time
Death and decay is all you’ll find
An endless cycle land, air and sea
But that don’t make some folk happy

Our spineless buddies have been trying to scream
There ain’t no God, its all dream
But we shunned them good and spit on their face
Now the jokes on us to our disgrace

If you ever sit and listen at the beach
You might just hear the crabs start preach
We’ve been changing for millions of years
Our diversity is high so listen here

If I were such an intelligent design
Why can’t I walk forward in a straight line
And perhaps if you take a close look you’ll see
Some crustaceans have asymmetry

If you ever walk through a tall forest
You might here spiders sing out in chorus
We’ve had millions of years to adapt
To cover this here entire map!

If I were but a special creation
Why should I die when I’m matin’
And if in our form there was no match
Why do some of us look like ants

Invertebrates as you can plainly see
Have tried to tell us for centuries
There can’t be no god you creationist
That’s why the spineless are atheist


  1. Kevin - This is incredible. By far your best work to date. Even better, I have to admit, than "Jim's Got a Green Northern Sea Urchin". It's well written, witty, intelligent, and poignant.

    And I love the "edgy" video.


  2. Hopefully we'll get to see the tabs soon as well? :)

  3. Jim, thanks! I think I may do more video blogging. We are thinking of moving into a house, especially now that winter is going set in. We live in way to small quarters for a family of 4. Hopefully i can soundproof a basement or spare room so I can make more productions during the cold months.

  4. Romunov, (capo 5) A Dm G C (walk B, C back to A) they whole song.


  5. I tried to leave a trackback to this post, but I saluted this "Blair Witch" video at my site. I think this is Hella-Cool.

  6. The Feds are coming to get you!

    I will try to put a link to this in one of my posts.

  7. New genre: Contemporary Geek Folk

    Love it!


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