YES WE CAN!!!!!!!!!!!!

This will be getting a lot of play while I count bacterial colonies today!! (hat tip to Marky Mark)

Can I just say w00t1!!!!!!!11!!!11!!!!!11

OMFG

Seriously though, did anyone else get watery-eyed during PRESIDENT-ELECT Obama's acceptance speech? I nearly balled out with tears of joy. Linda and I had to run outside in the run the yell out a big w00t!!! so we didn't wake the kids. I have never been this proud to be an american. I feel a new train a comin'. Its a new dawn. I can once again be proud for my country this moment. THIS IS FRIKKIN LANDSLIDE!! In case you didn't notice.



I can't wait to see North Carolina, Indiana and Montana filled in blue after its all said and done. It'll look even more purdy then.

Bush: Contraception is Abortion

Seriously, wtf?? I cannot fathom what goes on in a conservatives mind. It blows me away. Their twisted logic knows no ends. I got this from a facebook friend today.

It seems unbelievable, but the Bush Administration is quietly trying to redefine "abortion" to include birth control. The Houston Chronicle says this could wipe out dozens of state laws that protect women's reproductive freedom and protect rape victims. This "rule change" doesn't need congressional approval.

Can you join over 250,000 others in signing this emergency message to Health and Human Services Secretary Mike Leavitt, whose department is considering this rule change right now?

Click here to sign:
http://pol.moveon.org/contraception/?rc=fb.cnota

MoveOn and Planned Parenthood will deliver the petition to Secretary Leavitt this coming week.

Petition Text:
"Contraception is NOT abortion. The Bush Administration's proposal to change the definition of abortion and reduce women's access to birth control must be stopped."

I don't know what good these petitions really do, but what do we have to lose, right? It only needs your name and email address. The text is simple and to the point. So there is no excuse. You can also join the facebook group if do such things, already at 43K+ strong.

Scientists are Ignorant

Hat tip Atheist Media Blog.

The "Straight-Talk Express" Derailed

psst... pass it on to all your republican-leaning coworkers.

And before anyone gets snarky, politics has everything to do with science! Especially, the practice and funding of.

How Not To Use PowerPoint

Snail Dribble Post Follow-Up

So in my gmail there are (of course) Google Ads. When I received Mike's comment these were my targeted ads.



The irony of it all... *sigh* The blanket one is so random!

Got Bad Skin? Throw Some Snail Dribble On It!

"The dribble of snail contains: allantoin, glicolic acid, collagen, eslatin, proteins, antibiotics and natural vitamins."

Wow! A bunch of smart sciencey sounding words! It must work miracles.

"The studies have verified that the dribble of snail allows to prevent and to eliminate wrinkles, to attenuate grooves, to eliminate scars caused for wounded and burns of first degree, to remove the acne, to clean spots produced by the sun. It has also demonstrated to be effective to eliminate warts of the skin."

The "studies" not cited on the website? This stuff is being heavily marketed in Latin American countries. Here is a video for evidence (in spanish).



I love the fact that the actresses are sniffing the stuff and have such a pleased look on their face. It warms the heart of this invertebrate biologist to see gastropodal byproducts enjoyed by the masses. I have some mussel pseudofeces that is *proven* to be an excellent exfoliator! Contact me with your credit card info for more!

I am curious though what species they are using, is it just one species or will any snail do? Only terrestrial snails have been found in my web-analysis, are marine snails lacking one of the active ingredients listed above? Its funny what people put on themselves. Oh, and you can buy it with aloe too! Actually, I'm not sure their ad even makes sense in spanish "special wrinkles repairing cellular"??? Did I translate that incorrectly?



Please think before you buy into these snake-oil salesmen. And look out for my favorite women's beauty product ingredient: Urea or Uric Acid. Its piss baby! Which is acidic and often has the reverse effect of irritating skin...

Bloggers Support Echinoderms

"...we make a difference one starfish at a time."
-Jennifer Ouelette's comment on a very thought-provoking post on science and the media by Abel Pharmboy at Terra Sigillata.

Courtesy the Catawba County Government.

Raise Your Pereopod if You Hate Verizon and Forced Internet Providers

So I'm still out of internet service at home (where I do my blogging). I was told by the Verizon employee that helped me when I transferred service to my new address we would have internet access Dec. 12. Well that glorious day came and lo and behold... no internet service. I called that night only to be told by the nice, friendly automatic woman's voice (after a shouting a series of yes and no's, account numbers, etc.) that she couldn't help me and I need to call back within normal business hours.

So I called the next day and was utterly dumbfounded. Apparently, my account was suspended without my knowledge and the Verizon employee(s) couldn't tell me why. So after being transfered between 6 people (from the US to India at least twice...), hung up on once and shuttled between tech support and sales multiple times I finally came to the conclusion that I needed to start a new account. Fine.

So I got shuttled to a new person who quoted me the lowest price of $21.99. My old service was $14.99! In order to get that rate I had to order service online. OK, but I don't have internet service... His advice was to go to a buddy's. Fortunately for me I still do occasionally go into work and can obviously access the internet there or at the cafes where I sometimes operate out of (or the bar like I am right now). Unfortunately for my wife, who has been without internet and email access for 2 weeks now, she stays at and operates from home.

So I ordered service today and assuming it went through like the website said, I should be back in business by Dec. 21st. But, their customer service was horrendous and their answer to difficult questions is to shuttle you to India (whose answer is to shuttle you somewhere else too) or hang up on you. I wasn't being rude, but my tone was probably annoyed after about the 3rd person. And to top it off, I can't get the $14.99 rate for DSL without a 2 year committment. Since I know that I will not be here for 2 years and they made no mention of the fees for early termination, I didn't want to take my chances so I went with the 1 year contract at $17.99, still cheaper than ordering over the phone for whatever strange reason.

But don't despair, I'll be back better than ever. My end of the year stress is (mostly) over so I have a bit more time to write. Of course this misadventure has caused me to botch up hosting the Boneyard last week. I sincerely apologize to those who submitted and were expecting the Boneyard to be posted. Brian at Laelaps will be hosting the next edition and I'll make it up when I get fully restored.

Hey Windows Users, Stop Being So Fucking Wasteful

Cnn.com reports:

(CNN) -- True or False: Switching from a Windows-operated computer to a Linux-operated one could slash computer-generated e-waste levels by 50%.

The answer is: TRUE

A UK government study in late 2004 reported that there were substantial green benefits to running a Linux open source operating system (OS) on computers instead of the ubiquitous Windows OS, owned by Microsoft. The main problem with Windows users was that they had to change their computer twice as many times as Linux users, on average, thereby effectively creating twice as much computer-generated e-waste.

The report, titled, "Office of Government Commerce: Open Source Software Trials in Government - Final Report" reported the following:

"There are also potential Green Agenda benefits, through reducing the energy and resources consumed in manufacturing replacement equipment, and reducing landfill requirements and costs arising from disposal of redundant equipment.

"Industry observers quote a typical hardware refresh period for Microsoft Windows systems as 3-4 years; a major UK manufacturing organisation quotes its hardware refresh period for Linux systems as 6-8 years."

Though I do use a Mac like any intelligent person does (not to be a wanker Mr. Paddy K), I also run Linux (just switched to the Ubuntu distribution thanks to Mike) running WINE, which can run native windows programs. I haven't tried it out yet, since I've been taking exams, moving and finishing up massive grading, but have heard good things. The stupid thing is the only reason I need a Windows operating system is to run Primer (for my research) and MEGA (for a class). I'm hoping with this open source option I can rid myself of the necessity of using the Windows platform. Though I love my Mac, I would love to be entirely open source, just like how I would like to have research published in open access journals.

Hey folks, lets just get it all out in the open and stop being wasteful.

My Dream Job Slips Away From Me Yet Again... (Sigh)

You know you need to finish your PhD fast when you keep seeing your dream jobs slip away from you. The latest one to slip away from me is from the Royal British Columbia Museum in Victoria, Canada. The position is for Curator of Invertebrates with a possible appointment at the University of Victoria. As it stands now, I believe that I am the perfect candidate for the position.The Natural History Section of the Curatorial Services Branch has an excellent opportunity for a person with a desire to share the Invertebrate Zoology collection with the world!

The Curator, Invertebrate Zoology, will plan and participate in public programming and interpretation through exhibit planning, copy writing, scholarly and popular writing and public speaking. The incumbent will have an opportunity to perform scholarly research on at least one taxonomic group of invertebrates relevant to British Columbia while having a good knowledge of other invertebrate groups for specimen identification and collection development purposes. As a key member of a team, the incumbent will serve on a variety of committees and attend meetings as required. As a strong communicator, the Curator will be responsible for recruiting, training and directing the day-to-day activities of volunteers, co-op students and contractors.

I have plenty of experience working with the public showing off the diversity of deep-sea life at various university events, judging junior science competitions, explaining vent and seep ecology and the biology of the organisms there for grade school and college students, as well as for teacher workshops. I engage in scholarly writing (2 papers in review) as well as frequent popular writing (this blog for instance!) and have given public lectures on the history of science and on my research. I do research on and consider myself adept at deep sea anemones, zoanthids and crustaceans. I have one shrimp description in review, 7 anemones and a zoanthid almost completed (I hope to do the DNA extraction and sequencing next wek for the zoanthid). I would love to be a part of the NEPTUNE's VENUS project which is run out of the University of Victoria and am familiar the fauna from vents and seep world-wide and would be thrilled to start projects utilizing British Columbia's local fauna. I also have a wide knowledge-base of all marine invertebrate groups. My PhD work in studying community structure at vents has made me competent at identifying all the major phyla of marine invertebrates. And nothing makes me more pleased in my life than peering down a microscope and putting together the clues to solve the mystery of an organism's identity!

The ideal candidate will have a Doctorate degree in science relating to Invertebrate Zoology with an emphasis on taxonomy or systematics. In addition to being capable or qualified for cross appointments in universities, you will have proven knowledge of and practical experience in specimen identification. You will have experience planning, implementing and completing scientific research and while experience working in a museum setting is not mandatory, it is considered an asset. As a member of an organization responsible for sharing the wonders of the museum, the successful candidate will be comfortable with preparing and delivering presentations and providing information in both verbal and written form, about Invertebrate Zoology and the museum tohttp://www.blogger.com/img/gl.link.gif the academic and general user community.

So I don't have a doctorate degree yet, but I see the light at the end of the tunnel! Does that account for anything? If I were to be offered such a job, you bet I would wok my ass off to finish my degree within a year. I am scheduled to finish by December 2008. I do have experience planning and implementing research. I even have obtained my own grant for taxonomic research on vent anemones from the Census of Marine Life. As for finishing, well it all has to be done within the next year right?! As for delivering lectures about invertebrate zoology to the public... that is what I live for!

I am the best candidate for this job, but unfortunately don't stand a chance due to a small qualification issue. Quite frustrating and it only seems like one of these jobs comes by each year. Think about the plethora of applicants! Its got to be so cutthroat. I've often thought of starting my own consulting business for taxonomic services and ecological studies. Still toying with the idea, but I really love being in an academic/museum/research setting. Its very enriching. Sigh, what is a passionate science graduate student to do?

Think you are qualified too? Check out the job ad here.

Indonesia Swaps National Debt for Reef Protection

Nature News reported in the last issue that Indonesia is promising greater coral reef protection in exchange for forgiveness of portions of its national debt. Congress is expected to approve of the Tropical Forest and Coral Conservation Act, supported by President Bush, providing $75 million over 3 years to pay off debts owed to the US. Is this a good idea? Where is this money coming from? Conservation programs at home here in the USA have been systematically cut by Bush during his reign. Indonesia is not listed as a member nation of the "Coalition of the Willing", so I suspect heavy petting is not involved.

I certainly believe in coral reef conservation as a priority everywhere, but where do we find $75 million to forgive debt owed to us by other nations for a cause thus diminished here at home in the States? I have no training in economics, so correct me if I'm wrong but isn't this a double whammy? We give away $75 million of our tax dollars and forgive $75 million that is our money (plus interest??). So that is a loss of $150 million. Is my math right?

It is sad that a nation has to bribed to conserve its own natural resources. Coral reefs provide many ecosystem services. A United Nations Environmental Program (UNEP) report "In the front line: shoreline protection and other ecosystem services from mangroves and coral reefs" (2006: pdf) defined 4 categories of ecosystem services that coral reefs provide:

1) Regulating – e.g. protection of shores from storm surges and waves; prevention of erosion.
2) Provisioning – e.g. fisheries, building materials.
3) Cultural – e.g. tourism, spiritual appreciation.
4) Supporting – e.g. cycling of nutrients, fish nursery habitats.

Without any economic analysis, it should be plain to see that these 4 services are desirable and immediately affect many people from many different angles. Add on shoreline protection and the value only skyrockets:

Reefs and mangroves play an important role in shore protection under normal sea conditions and during hurricanes and tropical storms. At least 70-90 per cent of the energy of wind-generated waves is absorbed, depending on how healthy these ecosystems are and their physical and ecological characteristics.

So lets understand the estimated cost benefit of such services. This data is cited in the UNEP 2006 report mentioned above but is originally from Cesar 1996 (Cesar, H. 1996. Economic Analysis of Indonesian Coral Reefs. Work in Progress, Environment Department, World Bank: pdf)

From Cesar 1996, cited above

"Reefs adjacent to sparsely populated areas where agriculture is the main activity: US$829 per km, based on the value of agricultural production that would be lost if there were no protection. Reefs adjacent to areas of high population densities: US$50,000 per km, based on the cost of replacing housing and roads if coastal protection were lost. Reefs in areas where tourism is the main use: US$1 million per km, based on the cost of maintaining sandy beaches."-Cesar 1996 (cited in UNEP 2006)

It is not a trivial amount of money saved or provided as a result of ecosystem services. By increasing protection of coral reef ecosystems in its waters, Indonesia could very well save and earn enough money to pay off its debt while increasing the standard of living for its citizens. I am not naive enough to know think the situation there is that simple, but minimal effort can yield large gains.

The US passed a similar bill 1998 exchanging debt relief for conservation work. Nature News reported that in 2003

"... the US government cancelled $10 million in debt owed by Panama to protect the Chagres National Park. The money is being spent on projects such as park-boundary enforcement to stem illegal farming and training locals as ecotourist guides."

Will bribing Indonesia to protect is reefs work? Indonesia has the financial incentive to protect its reefs without any additional rewards. I think this reflects the lack of long-term thinking in politics. Ecosystem services as a concept requires forward thinking, waiting to reap the benefits much like the college mutual funds I started for my children. It doesn't seem like much use now and is of no immediate benefit to anyone, but after 18 years of growth it will ensure the continuing educations of Elliot and Freya so that they may continue to grow as individuals. Ecosystem services works similarly. Putting say, $75 million into protecting wetlands across the USA's coastlines might not seem to have much use in the here and now, but in 18 years when another Category 5 hurricane makes landfall in the south, certain affected individuals will be grateful 70-90% of the wind-driven wave energy ("current consensus" in UNEP 2006) was reduced due to the services these coastal habitats indirectly provide.

Revelations: How My Readers Are Finding Me

I like Statcounter. Its a very useful, free counter that tells me lots of interesting things about the people that come to my site. One of these interesting things is that I can see what websites people come here from and what keywords people use to find my site on a search engine. As you all know I wrote a post on the promiscuity of a certain sea squirt titled Sea Squirt Chics Have No Inhibitions. Which also inspired my one hit wonder Sea Squirts Just Want to Have Fun. I have been getting some, not a whole lot, but more than a few hits a week to my website by people searching "squirting chics" or variants of those two words.

Click to enlarge

I find this highly revealing about my readers. I'm not quite sure what to make of my website being listed alongside "Ejaculating Women Videos", a "How to squirt loads" forum, femaleorgasmsrevealed.com, etc. I guess sex sells right? So am I just another purveyor of perverted invertebrate pornography?

I Just Shit A Brick...

... and my heart skipped a few beats, my fists clenched, my teeth gnashed together...

Selected quotes from NY Times:

But in an interview with a book author in the Oval Office one day last December, he daydreamed about the next phase of his life, when his time will be his own.

First, Mr. Bush said, “I’ll give some speeches, just to replenish the ol’ coffers.” With assets that have been estimated as high as nearly $21 million, Mr. Bush added, “I don’t know what my dad gets — it’s more than 50-75” thousand dollars a speech, and “Clinton’s making a lot of money.”

Then he said, “We’ll have a nice place in Dallas,” where he will be running what he called “a fantastic Freedom Institute” promoting democracy around the world. But he added, “I can just envision getting in the car, getting bored, going down to the ranch.”

Thats just nice Mr. Bush. I'm sure your "freedom institute" will be very successful in promoting democracy in certain oil-exporting countries around the world. But what really get me is the following:

“I’m playing for October-November.” That is when he hopes the Iraq troop increase will finally show enough results to help him achieve the central goal of his remaining time in office: “To get us in a position where the presidential candidates will be comfortable about sustaining a presence,” and, he said later, “stay longer.”

I'm glad to hear you are playing with war. Its wonderful that you have the interests of the presidential candidates above the lives my fellow citizens serving abroad. The ones that should be here working to support their families or going to college to learn a skill that will advance them in their future or otherwise enjoying daily life in the serene surroundings of Whereverville, USA. "Staying longer" is certainly a good plan for the republicans since they obviously can't get policy and democracy right in our country, its better that they practice abroad for another 8 years, perfect their version of democracy. Kind of like Second Life or a video game. Keith Olbermann brought this information to my attention just now in "Special Comment" rant on his show tonight. I loved it even it was a bit overdone on the dramatic tone. Here are several excerpts, click the last link for the transcript.

-----------snip------------
Mr. Bush probably did not know that, with his own words, he had already proved that he had been lying… is lying… will be lying.... about Iraq.

He presumably did not know, that there had already appeared those damning excerpts from Robert Draper's book "Dead Certain."

"I'm playing for October-November," Mr. Bush said to Draper.

That, evidently, is the time during which, he thinks he can sell us the real plan.

Which is, to quote him: "To get us in a position where the presidential candidates, will be comfortable about sustaining a presence."Comfortable” -- that is -- with saying about Iraq, again quoting the President, "stay... longer."

And there it is, Sir.

We've caught you.

Your goal is not to bring some troops home -- maybe -- if we let you have your way now;

Your goal is not to set the stage for eventual withdrawal;

You are, to use your own disrespectful, tone-deaf word, playing at getting the next Republican nominee to agree to jump into this bottomless pit with you, and take us with him, as we stay in Iraq for another year, and another, and another, and anon.
-----------snip-------------
...the President's true hope is that they will not come home; but that they will stay there, because he is keeping them there now, in hope that those from his political party fighting to succeed him, will prolong this unendurable disaster into the next decade.
-----------snip-------------
That is your genius, Sir -- as you see it, anyway.

You can deduce what we want -- we, the people, remember us? -- and then use it against us.

You can hold that canteen up and promise it to the parched nation.

And the untold number of Americans whose lives have not been directly blighted by Iraq -- or who do not realize that their safety has been reduced and not increased by Iraq -- they will get the bullet points: 'Bush is thinking about bringing some troops home. Bush even went to Iraq.'

You can fool some of the people all of the time, can't you, Mr. Bush?
-----------snip-----------
And this laziest of Presidents, actually interrupted his precious time off to fly to Iraq to play at a photo opportunity... with soldiers... some of whom will... on his orders... be killed before the year... maybe the month... is out.

Feel free to shit a brick and unload it in the comment thread...