Nature Blog Network

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Got Bad Skin? Throw Some Snail Dribble On It!

"The dribble of snail contains: allantoin, glicolic acid, collagen, eslatin, proteins, antibiotics and natural vitamins."
Wow! A bunch of smart sciencey sounding words! It must work miracles.
"The studies have verified that the dribble of snail allows to prevent and to eliminate wrinkles, to attenuate grooves, to eliminate scars caused for wounded and burns of first degree, to remove the acne, to clean spots produced by the sun. It has also demonstrated to be effective to eliminate warts of the skin."
The "studies" not cited on the website? This stuff is being heavily marketed in Latin American countries. Here is a video for evidence (in spanish).

I love the fact that the actresses are sniffing the stuff and have such a pleased look on their face. It warms the heart of this invertebrate biologist to see gastropodal byproducts enjoyed by the masses. I have some mussel pseudofeces that is *proven* to be an excellent exfoliator! Contact me with your credit card info for more!

I am curious though what species they are using, is it just one species or will any snail do? Only terrestrial snails have been found in my web-analysis, are marine snails lacking one of the active ingredients listed above? Its funny what people put on themselves. Oh, and you can buy it with aloe too! Actually, I'm not sure their ad even makes sense in spanish "special wrinkles repairing cellular"??? Did I translate that incorrectly?

Please think before you buy into these snake-oil salesmen. And look out for my favorite women's beauty product ingredient: Urea or Uric Acid. Its piss baby! Which is acidic and often has the reverse effect of irritating skin...


  1. No wonder you have problems translating that; it's lousy Spanish.

    Especial arrugas reparador celular.

    Could be, "Reparador celular especial para arrugas", "Cellular repair agent, specially for wrinkles".

    Or, "Especial reparador celular para arrugas"; "Special cellular repair agent for wrinkles," or maybe "Special cell repair agent for wrinkles."

    However it may be, the "arrugas" is in the wrong place.

  2. I thought so too! I do know some spanish. I took 2 years in college and used to play soccer in CA with los immigrantes illegales lol

    But the words didn't make much sense together although I got the idea.

  3. Dammit! Why'd you have to blow the whistle on this one? I was just about to offer the low-cost althernative, Slug-Piss.

    "We Save on the Shells, so You Save on the Cream."

    I almost had a deal to appear on Oprah and distribute through Wal-Mart.

  4. FDA approved? LOL

    I am positive you can still get it distributed through MallWart


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